Monday, January 31, 2005
thinking..
Thinking
by Sarah Healy
Thinking. Can't stop thinking.
Think of you. This. That. That Life. That day.
That dream was mine.
A utopian dream.
Your aura; struck me like lightning to a tree.
Pointy, like a star, you shone.
So bright, yet not shining as a star would,
But as apparent as white chalk on a blackboard.
You would not show off like a star.
Yet you did burn so hot, so fiercely, so explosively -
you were a star in my eyes.
But like all stars, you died.
That gas was gone.
No pull between us.
The atmosphere was dryand I began to choke.
I was taken from my star -
like a child being taken from its poor,drunken mother -
I did not know what was happening.
Dazed. Confused. Without true reality, I there sat.
Wondering.
The end of my world had only just begun, with yours beginning..
babyheartz's black past on 9:23 PM
slow tears....
Slow Tears
by Martini
I look up
as a tear rolls slowly
down my cheek
I think about better days
and wonder if I'll feel that way again
you look at me
with those eyes I know so well
always serious, so deep and insightful
as though you're always in control
But not todaynot now
Now you look so scared
like for once you don't have the answer
I gaze at you
looking deep into those hazel eyes
Hoping to understand
why you've said those things you did
I wonder for a moment
if this is all a dream
if I shall wake in the morning
and be relieved
you look at me
with a confusion I have never seen
slowly pull me towards you
and wipe the tears from my cheek..
babyheartz's black past on 8:47 PM
a thought...
to that someone...
missing u everyday.. wish u were here.. wish things had happened a different way.. wish we had more time... wish i said something... now its too late.. so im movin on... but a part of me will always love u... and a part of me will always cherish u.. but guess its time to forget u.. so this is me saying goodbye...
dedicated to the one person i ever loved.. do take care.. in my heart always...
babyheartz's black past on 2:34 PM
so much work.. so tired..
hmm.. havent written for a few days.. been so busy.. haha.. well.. lets recap shall we?.. thursday was the juniors dance.. they did a great job... make up was fun and the backstage dressing room was pretty nice la.. then thurs was
funkamania... i think my seniors did a great job la.. i was so proud of them!
Da contradictz rule! haha... although they didnt win i think they deserve an applause just for their efforts.. im so jealous man.. wish can dance like them.. hehe..
hmm.. sat had drama.. only a few ppl turned up.. but it was fun... did this really sad story where i had to cry.. and i did it.. thank god.. i think all that training of the monologue thing at the camp did a hell alot of good for me.. i know how to get my emotions out better.. although my acting skills still has alot to be improved on.. but i hope to work on that diring the preparation for production..
hmm.. then sunday was fun.. my groupmates came over to do the family assesment thing... i ordered pizza and i fried chicken for them.. i think they enjoyed the food.. the whole interview thing went quite fine la.. fortunately... then we worked a bit on out ICA before they all left..
well.. i just finished my ICA presentation a few hrs ago.. it went ok la.. lecturer said she could probably give us a B and above... so im glad la.. but must work hard for upcoming projects also.. haizz... then my attendance is a bit screwed up also.. need to settle that later..
im so looking forward to working together with the other casts in the production.. im sure it will be a blast! but i know i will have to work hard... i hope i do ok...
OMG... im spo far behind on my work.. er.. gotta go.. if i dun start to work i will fail this semester!..kk.. till next time yah!!
babyheartz's black past on 1:07 PM
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
dazed...
today... despite having an MC... i went to skool.. wow.. was like stoned all day.. the stupid meds made me all disoriented and drowsy.. i almost went into the guys toilet!! haha.. ok. laugh all u want... but i was really like blur... every chance i got i slept a bit.. i think if i didnt do si.. i would have been like dead...
hmm.. had make up just now... today quite fun la.. surprisingly faisial and nash came! haha.. that faisal ar.. wah... really FON u knoww.. haha.. funny guy la.. but i think cause of my sickness + drowsyness, i cannot appreciate the humor today... but still laugh a bit.. then that yee shan also so cute sia.. see my face liddat aske me who bully me.. he will go and find the fella.. haha.. adorable la he.. want to defend me la..ahaha.. then nash.. the face a bit black today(no pun).. i just meant that he is a bit moody today.. then after make up had gift xchange.. haha.. thank god farhana liked the seal thing... haha.. and i like the bracelet she gave me also.. and the paper thing shidah did was adorable!...
hmm.. wad else ar.. oh ya.. 3 dance events comin up... all one after another.. wah.. im sure gonna be tired man.. nvm.. all for stagearts la.. hehe.. really hope my seniors win funka man..
oops.. will be back later! amazing race starting!!
babyheartz's black past on 9:52 PM
a monologue
"Thank you.. Thanks for all the pain u put me through. Thanks for all the lessons u taught me. How never to trust.. Never to let another person see me put my heart on my sleeve. Never to let anyone know exactly how im feeling.. never to cry in front of u.. or anyone again.. Thank u. for teaching me that this world is far crueler than I thought it was.. Was it fun for u? Was it amusing to see me hang on ur every word? It was funny wasn’t it? I bet it was… unfortunately, u didn’t know that we were laughing about u too. did u think that we were so stupid? So naïve that we didn’t see through your transparent lies? Did u think that u were fooling a 3 yr old? No.. we knew.. I don’t know if it was ur lack of realization or just plain stupidity.. that made your lies stand out as though they were decked in fluorescent lights.. its just unfortunate that I was in too deep to realize the biggest lie u were playing.. Too deep to see that behind that caring exterior. U were laughing at me.. The fool…"
just a monologue.. dedicated to that person from my past.. in case i forgot to tell this person...here goes.. "go to hell!!!!'...
babyheartz's black past on 1:07 AM
nobody's home...
"Nobody's Home"
I couldn't tell you why she felt that way,
She felt it everyday. And I couldn't help her,
I just watched her make the same mistakes again.
What's wrong, what's wrong now?
Too many, too many problems.
Don't know where she belongs, where she belongs.
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.
Open your eyes and look outside, find the reasons why.
You've been rejected, and now you can't find what you left behind.
Be strong, be strong now.
Too many, too many problems.
Don't know where she belongs, where she belongs.
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.
Her feelings she hides.
Her dreams she can't find.
She's losing her mind.
She's fallen behind.
She can't find her place.
She's losing her faith.
She's fallen from grace.
She's all over the place.
Yeah,ohShe wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.
She's lost inside, lost inside...oh oh
She's lost inside, lost inside...oh oh yeah
babyheartz's black past on 1:00 AM
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
so long....
OMG.. Its been so long!! im so sorry..haha... im apologising to my blog!(pathetic right).. been so busy man.. project after project... so much school work... oh dear.. and stagearts... haha.. but i do have good new... I GOT IN!!!!! yes.. its true.. belive it! ur eyes are not tricking u! (i thought my ears were trickin me!).. i got into the production! OMG.. so exciting... haha..ok.. anyway, stagearts camp was a real eye opener.. i cried my eyes out.. i laughed my head off and i developed a bond with my fellow stagearters also.. it was a good camp la.. though there were times when i and other ppl were just plain pissed la..till the point i just wanted to go home.. but thank god that was just for awhile.. the rest was good all the way..
hmm.. open house is over also.. PHEW.. another hurdle jumped over gracefully..haha.. ti was a blast really.. tired yes.. but fun all the same.. haha.. was so proud of my mascots.. did justice to the make up artists work! haha... a bit of problems here and there.. but nothin can be perfect right..
anyway... hah.. guess what... i found someone cute!..haha.. but cant tell who la.. but recently keep tallkin to him.. adorable sia.. (shh..sun bother askin me who.. NO ONE know who)...
anyway.. haizz.. no time... got to go soon also.. got work to do.. im actually sick now.. i have MC for tomorrow.. but u know what.. i still got to go 2 skool cause got clinical.. dun want to attend clinical in another class.. then also got make up.. this week got to impt events.. so cant miss make up also.haha.. MC no use man.. anyway,.. catch up real soon k.. dun miss me!
Ps: to all my friends, msg me more often la.. dun want to loose touch with u ppl! take care...
babyheartz's black past on 11:10 PM
Thursday, January 06, 2005
haha.. nothing to do
im in my e learnin lab now.. wahaha.. more that 2hrs break man... juz sittin here with my friends... my cms and attendacne is all screwed up man... i dun give a damn la... so fed up already.. but luckily i have a new bio lecturer..wahaha.. Dr yong is such a good lecturer.. i actually payed attention 4 bio! wahaha... yesterday went 4 stageasts la.. make up and stuff.. still got so much costume things to take care of.. haizz.. and auditon results still not out.. dum di dum di dum...
haizz.. looks like i got my work cut out 4 me this semester.... there is more workload and on top of that CCA is so busy also.. Nvm.. hopefully it will all pay of la. I hope... hmm.. k la..better get back to doing some work.. update soon!
babyheartz's black past on 10:52 AM
